All my old aspirations have been lost over time or just faded out until I completely forgot about 'em. I wanted to be an English teacher because I would teaching literature and whatnot, but then I decided not to. I wanted to be something involved with art history, but my memory will hold me back, so I gave up on that one. I thought about being a court reporter like my mom, and I'm still considering that as an option. But I'm so...empty. I've got nothing. My days consist of the same routine. By the time I crawl under my covers at night, I'm either - on the verge of tears, too high to fall asleep, or completely drained to the point that I'm numb. I'm tired of thinking and feeling. I wish I could neglect all responsibility and sit around and do what I do best. Nothing. I am so talented at procrastinating, it's like an art form. If I could major in procrastination, I would do just fine.
Something that has always been on my mind was opening my own shop. For what? I'm not too sure. I would love to say a bakery, but bakeries usually don't have the best business. If I could open a shop and sell edibles and all kinds of food, I would be so fucking happy. I could combine all my favorite things - food, weed and money. So, that's my goal. (For now.) I feel pretty confident thinking about this, so I'm going to run with it. Fuck it. This is what I want to do. I'm going to talk to my counselor to change my major to entrepreneurship.
Fuck off, everyone. I gave up on my social life weeks ago, and I'm doing better. I just want to focus on me. I've been a selfish bitch as of lately so I apologize to anyone and everyone. I am my top priority. Me. That's all I care about. I don't need anyone but me.
I've been falling apart for months, but I swear that I'm finally picking up the pieces. I have no other choice.
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