"The time has come for colds and overcoats"

Hi. I am feeling relieved. Time has finally slowed down and I am back to normal. I can breathe again.

Tonight was the art history final exam. I studied all morning and I think I did alright. I'm sure I missed a few, but it's certainly better than the other exams I've had in there. Hopefully I get a decent grade, because if I bomb this one...I'm fucked. Anyways...happy thoughts, happy thoughts! School is almost over and winter break is almost here, I can taste it. I can't wait to sleep in. Sleep all day, every day.

I have a doctor's appointment in the morning, I need to get some blood work done. Blah blah blah, I'm still unhealthy, blah blah blah. I'm trying to be healthier. I'm doing better now though. Went to see the doctor a few days ago and got things prescribed to me to help, blah blah blah. It's just annoying now. I need to go to the gym again. I will once school ends, I swear...don't judge me.

I'm just trying to be positive, that's all. Things don't seem so dramatic with my newfound perspective. I'm such a bitch now, but it keeps me feeling good so that's all that matters. I come first. I'm the only person who truly gives a shit about me.

Unfortunately I've realized how skeptical I am. I just can't believe a word anyone says anymore. Just quit feeding me bullshit and we'll be fine. Don't make this harder than it has to be.

Don't have much to do right now. I guess I'll take a shower, pass some time. Procrasterbation will be the death of me. Just kidding, sort of.

I just don't want to care anymore. These past few months have been hell I guess. I've been all over the place. And now, with this new attitude, I feel invincible again. I don't want to care. I don't want to worry. I don't want to feel paranoid, or anxious, or disappointed. And no more overanalyzing, that's over with. Expect a happier, bitchier me. I now give zero fucks and I like it that way.

It's officially December. It gets too fucking cold sometimes, I hate it! And all this Christmas music is silly, it's been playing since the beginning of November. I really don't care about this holiday. I guess I'm just bitter. It's been five years since we've had a Christmas where we were all truly happy. I wish my grandma and Reggie were still here. That's the only wish I've got for Christmas.

Winter time is loneliness's best friend. It's cold and miserable and bitter. I've always been lonely, but now I see it in a different light. I like being alone. I really do.

Alright, time to cure this headache.

Tomorrow, I'm going to lose my mind!